


death has a weird working hour

by mirajanes



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), M/M, the author just needs a place to channel their sadness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:49:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 821
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28217997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mirajanes/pseuds/mirajanes
Summary: small fragments of atsumu's life after the death of kageyama tobio
Relationships: Kageyama Tobio/Miya Atsumu
Comments: 4
Kudos: 55





	death has a weird working hour

“ _heaven is a place on earth with you,_  
_tell me all the things you wanna do,_ ”  
— lana del rey, [ video games ](https://open.spotify.com/track/0fBSs3fRoh1yJcne77fdu9?si=xVCpUPk6RL-8U0VAn5n47w)

* * *

when it happened, atsumu didn’t know how to describe the feeling.

he is unable to cry, even if he tried to force himself to cry. to be honest? he felt nothing. just nothing. seeing his husband’s cold body, all laid on the bed, a smile on his face.

when miya atsumu was 50, his husband of 20 years, boyfriend of another 10 years, kageyama tobio, passed away. it was a peaceful death as he was sleeping when it happened.

 _they_ were sleeping when it happened. atsumu woke up that morning, just as usual, as he kissed tobio’s forehead. it was routine, just like breathing, just like blinking your eyes.

however, it felt cold. the warmth was no longer there. weirded out, atsumu shook tobio’s body, in an attempt to wake tobio up, but his husband won’t even budge for a bit.

“tobio?”

atsumu didn’t dare to check the pulse, so he checked tobio’s breath, and after he felt nothing, no winds, no breaths coming out from tobio’s nose, he knew. he just knew.

_fuck_

atsumu didn’t even cry.

he just stood up, and called the hospital first.

“hello?”

“i think.. my husband just died?”

* * *

according to the doctor, it was because of arrhythmia.

 _fucking piece of shit_ , atsumu thought.

tobio was fit for his age. he didn’t even reached fifty yet, and he had no heart problems at all. fuck, he was an _athlete_ , for fuck’s sake. retired, but still fit. how the fuck can an athlete just . have sudden arrhythmia?

a lot were playing on atsumu’s mind, but the most memorable part was a throwback to two years ago, when they were on a beach, having bbq with their friends. tobio back then once asked him, “what will you do when i’m gone?”

atsumu threw the frisbee disc to tobio, and replied, “fuck yer. between you and me i think i’ll die first, i’ve been living such a lax life if yer wanna compare me to you, and these fucking back pains will be the death of me.”

back then, atsumu only took it lightheartedly, because, there is no way, _no fucking way_ that tobio will pass away that soon.

_death really has a weird working hour, ain’t it_

* * *

when the burial happened, atsumu just stood up there, staring at the casket.

somehow, he still refused to believe the fact that tobio is laying inside that casket, no longer breathing. 

this isn’t his first time dealing with death, though.

when you’ve reached half of a century, you’ve seen many things already. his, their parents passed away already, their dog bocchan, some senpais in high school. that auntie that used to sell flowers on the corner of the street.

but none hurts as much as this one.

when atsumu’s mother passed away, he was quite young at that time. she got into an accident when he was 27. he remembered being angry, and tobio was there to comfort him.

both him and osamu were sad at that time, and angry. felt betrayed by the world. by god. gods.

_but none of them were as hurtful as this one._

osamu was there, and he handled most of the things that happened. many people came to atsumu, gave their condolences, but atsumu remembered none. it all just went through his ear, no notable words to help him found solace.

how is he supposed to find solace, when his source of solace is no longer breathing?

* * *

after the burial, osamu offered for atsumu to stay at his home, with his family. anything to keep atsumu sane, to keep him alive.

but atsumu declined, saying that it’s ok.

he went back home and lived life as usual, or so it seems.

here’s the thing. miya atsumu is in denial.

he refused to believe that tobio has passed away. he knew, for a fact that, tobio is already gone. already dead, six feet deep under the ground. dead. _dead_.

death is a foreign thing to miya atsumu.

but atsumu keeps on living as if tobio’s alive. he prepared meals for two, and wondered why didn’t his husband come down and eat his breakfast yet? “babe, it’s almost two in the evening. didn’t ya have some volleyball coaching to do?” he shouted from the kitchen, hoping for a reply.

but the only thing that responded to him was the cold wind blowing in january, reminding him of the harsh truth.

this too shall pass by, is something atsumu hold firmly onto. however, he has no idea at all on how to let this pass by. letting this pass by is equivalent to accepting tobio’s death and as much as how he wanted to let go, he is unable to let go.

because, truth be told, how are you able to let things close to you go?

**Author's Note:**

> wait i just realised it's 22nd dec... i am so sorry for dropping this on kageyama's birthday...


End file.
